I Promise

To listen to “my” candidate

With heavy-duty filtered ears

Only allowing what gets through

To hear what I want to hear

The “other” candidate with

Sharp discerning ears

In a broader range to

Pick-up dog whistles

Whilst living in fear






If I may be so Freudian

Both candidates are starting

To sound like my mother

After stating, I was moving out

Making impossible promises

To retain me to stay, such as

I’ll make you breakfast each day

You can park anywhere

On the driveway, and I won’t

Charge you rent like I said

(Which triggered the whole

Get out of Dodge plan anyway)



The funny thing is, both are each

Adopting and adapting the other’s

Plans, proposals, and promises

Reverberating off the rhetoric

Until you can’t tell who is doing what



I promise

I’ll help you buy a house

With magic money, I just made up

While I make sure there are more houses

To bring down the value of the houses

People are already indebted to the banks for

” Ooopsie, don’t pay attention to that part” – “46.5”

I’ll lower your taxes

I’ll jack up other countries’ tariffs so high

You’ll live in America for free while

China and all other gross importers

Pay for you to live in the land of the free

“That must be how it is meant,

No wonder I’m a stable genius” – “45”

I’ll do something about the border

I won’t let any more people in

I will kick everyone out

I’ll fricking let you frack

I’ll let you kill in womb fetuses

I’ll let you kill out of womb fetuses



Please, please, please, pick me, pick me

Are these two candidates vying to lead or

Running to be a classless class president?




Whoa, decisions, decisions, decisions

Made on vague impossible promises that

I promise to investigate after the election

But only if “my” candidate loses because

I am going to participate in a rigged game





“Never had a doubt in the beginning
Never a doubt
Trusted you true in the beginning

//

You made me promises, promises
Knowing I’d believe
Promises, promises
You knew you’d never keep

Second time around, I’m still believing
The words that you said
You said you’d always be here

//

You made me promises, promises
You knew you’d never keep
Promises, promises
Why do I believe?

//

You made me promises, promises
You knew you’d never keep
Promises, promises
Why do I believe
All of your promises
You knew you’d never keep
Promises, promises
Why do I believe?

Promises
Promises
Promises
Promises
Promises

“Promises, Promises” with “love” lyrics “//” removed

– Naked Eyes



“So I know that a little later on this year, you’re going to have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much. You enjoy yourselves. It will be a lot of fun. I’m sure as soon as the election is over, your country will “improve” immediately.

As for me, I’ll be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you, the only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, I’m going to have a little something to show for it folks.”

– George Carlin



“Sometimes, I just follow

A dark path…… because

I can not find my way.”


– Angelo Devlin