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Faking Insincerity

September 23, 2016

People think I do my best work faking insincerity .

It is not that….., I don’t care,  I do.

It just doesn’t appear, or seem as such.

I already feel,  this will be difficult to explain,  but here goes.

Even though, I am only explaining it to myself, as this, is being typed to solely,  or rather soul-ly to benefit me.

I’ll just let it find its way, onto the screen,  and if I have to,  re-sequence it later for clarity, I will.

For starters,  I have an innate sense  (of which, can’t really explain) that reincarnation is real.  Beyond anything I’ve ever read, or heard.

Reincarnation : M-W.com

: the idea or belief that people are born again with a different body after death:

Kind of like believing in god, regardless of how clever,  convincing, or passionate one can communicate that, there still is absolutely no proof.

Therefore, faith is just a perception based projection of reality, modified to best suit, ones own perceived needs or desires.

Faith, according to M-W.com

: belief in the existence of God :strong religious feelings or beliefs.
To make my point, the following quotes are from the movie “Contact” which ironically only prove to disprove my point.

[Ellie challenges Palmer to prove the existence of God]

Palmer Joss: Did you love your father?

Ellie Arroway: What?

Palmer Joss: Your dad. Did you love him?

Ellie Arroway: Yes, very much.

Palmer Joss: Prove it.

Or ufo’s,  big foot, the loch Ness monster, Noah’s ark etc.  Quite frankly,  the way I seem to be wired, could disprove my own existence.  I sometimes do.

The thoughts that roll through my perceived mind, could easily be, the random result of the orchestration of sound, generated from cricket legs, atop a jello mountain, under a suspended vertical body of water,  where the seven eyed fish are listening, with their zorba gills, dreaming of a bipedal earthling writing this at a keyboard.

Who is to prove otherwise?

Now that “we” have that established,

(“we” as in there must be more than one entity in this biological vehicle directing the phlanges to press the alphabetical registering keys to magically manifest digitized pixels on the screen to read. )

I seem to look at things very long term, (which could be bullshit too),  if you go, with Einstein theory, reasoning, that time doesn’t exist,  and everything is happening all at once.  Unfortunately and frighteningly,  makes sense.

Joe Rogan: says:

(Not for me, but in a “bit”)

I think it’s a good idea to be paranoid, now and again because, I think people are entirely too cocky for the situation that we’re confronted with, with what, this life actually is.

We’re on a fucking giant ball that is spinning in space, and nobody talks about it. It’s going a thousand miles an hour.

Floating in the sky above us is a giant fireball a million times bigger than the Earth, and you need it for Vitamin D.

If you stare at it you’ll go blind, it’s trying to give you cancer and if it’s not there you get sad…… We’re spinning in infinity……..

Whew, I’ll never get through this. Will someone, please clean the turtle wax out of the zorba gills? Thank you.

Where was I?   Oh yeah,  faking insincerity.  Sometimes I think I “should” try to be more human. Which seems to include a lot of complaining,  of which I do too.

My complaints,  though,  are mostly about the complainers.  For example,  it seems most of the people, I work around,  (which, is not really,  for I drive by myself for 9 + hours, round trip) where the intermittent interactions audibly observed, get an earful,  of this place sucks, management doesn’t know anything etc, If “they”only did it “my” way, it’d be perect.

If you don’t like it, quit, or help change it.

Humans have such an incredible capacity to do, or be anything they want.

Why would a person spend one breathing moment, to remain in a state of perceived aggravation.

Yikes, that last paragraph was for me, more than anybody else.  I’m just aggravated, from all the other angles in the mirror, that you can’t see.

“Don’t trust anyone who isn’t angry.”

John Trudell

Maybe that is why, I have a bumper sticker on my car, that reads.

“I’m doing what I’d rather be doing. ”

Oddly enough, it was like driving in La, the traffic never bothered me, because I did nothing to create it.

Whether reincarnation is “true” or not, it is at least a concept to live life from, for the alternative is quite bleak to have this much fun, only to become worm food or shark chum, depending on where you cease to exist.
 “Hallowed Be Thy Name”  Iron Maiden

I’m waiting in my cold cell when the bell begins to chime

Reflecting on my past life and it doesn’t have much time

‘Cause at 5 o’clock they take me to the Gallows Pole

The sands of time for me are running low

When the priest comes to read me the last rites

I take a look through the bars at the last sights

Of a world that has gone very wrong for me

Can it be that there’s some sort of an error

Hard to stop the surmounting terror

Is it really the end not some crazy dream?

Somebody please tell me that I’m dreaming

It’s not easy to stop from screaming

But words escape me when I try to speak

Tears they flow but why am I crying?

After all I am not afraid of dying

Don’t I believe that there never is an end?

As the guards march me out to the courtyard

Someone calls from a cell “God be with you”

If there’s a God then why has he let me go?

As I walk, all my life drifts before me

And though the end is near, I’m not sorry

Catch my soul ’cause it’s willing to fly away

Mark my words, believe my soul lives on

Don’t worry now that I have gone

I’ve gone beyond to seek the truth

When you know that your time is close at hand

Maybe then you’ll begin to understand

Life down there is just a strange illusion

Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Hallowed be Thy name
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Hallowed be Thy name

This went nowhere,  other than it entertained me to write it.

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