“I ascribe to Mark Twain’s theory* that the last person who should be President is the one who wants it the most.
The one who should be picked, is the one who should be dragged, kicking and screaming into the White House.”
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– Bill Hicks
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I would run for president, but methinks I would be assassinated upon announcing my platform. So……
Here is my platform.
Hmmm, so many places to start.
It would probably be too frivolous to start by changing the National Anthem to John Lennon’s “Imagine”, so, will save that for later as a global / cosmic anthem.
First up, remove the rule of law.
Eliminating the vague mock adherence to the ineffective, selective, defective and deceptive to the collective, “Rule of Flaw”.
The premise, that making something “illegal” by printing words on a page and “enforcing” them, has never prevented any unwanted activity.
Never ever, in any culture at any time. From alleged “stone tablets” to “legal libraries” in marble buildings.
Not only is Justice “blind”, it is deaf and dumb. It is also manipulated by skin color, money in the bank, social position. Who one knows, or doesn’t know. Pushed by for profit prisons, etc.
In other words, it is corrupt, plus its very title reveals that. Why else would it be called a “Criminal Justice System” ?
While at first, this sounds like it might create societal anarchy, even just starting with traffic “laws”. Knowing you won’t get a “ticket” for “speeding”.
Quickly, most would realize it would turn into a self preservation thing and would be a consequential act of looking out for others by looking out for one’s self.
“Here’s a little red light story, somebody told me.” “A guy is driving along, got someone, sitting right next to him and he goes right through a red light sssweeeeew. Guy goes “What are you doing? Nevermind, will ya, my brother drives like this. Goes a little bit further, comes to another red light, sssweeeeew, goes right through it. Guy goes “What are you doing? I told you, nevermind, my brother drives like this. Goes a little bit further, comes to a green light……. and stops. Guy goes “What are you doing?, Well, my brother might be coming the other way.
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– George Carlin
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If that doesn’t explain the theory, I don’t know what will. Other than without laws, my perception is that by “selfishly” looking out for ourselves, we’d be intentionally and unintentionally looking out for everyone else. All of our “brothers” and “sisters”.
We are living in anarchy now, we just don’t call it that. Here is “definitive” proof.
Anarchy:
b : a state of lawlessness or political disorder due to the absence of governmental authority
– m-w.com
One thing I’ve noticed in order to stir the masses, there needs to be an invisible intangible improbable bogeyman. I guess to be politically correct, that would be a bogey person, better yet a bogey entity.
Most administrations have used some form of “ism”. Something nobody can “see” or put a finger on, but is used to scare the begeezuz out of a docile mass.
Prior to this tempestuous twitter tweeting toddler twit. The bogeyman was terrorism, or communism, or McCarthyism, or socialism etc. You get the picture.
45 switched it up from an ism to a shun (tion), making the bogeyman, immigration. Taking cues from recent previous administrations by scapegoating brown people.
I will double down, breaking away from the singular format of motivation that eludes to the illusionary protectionist scheme, that some how a monolithic “Big Brother” will be able to protect everyone, when in reality, it can protect no one. Also, will move it from fear to hope.
Two tangibles that each individual can grasp and do something about themselves. Making the seemingly necessary bogeyman defeatable.
Here it is, Ignorance and Complacency. Which can be personally defeated by reading and engaging.
Otherwise, the nonsense we are currently participating in, merely maintains the status quo of the haves, the have nots and the have mores.
Which does minimal for the individual to master the creativity of our divinity in the infinity for all eternity.
* As of this writing can not find that Mark Twain reference
Likewise, have not heard those words from Bill Hicks in a recording, however saw it attributed to him. Seems like something he “might” have said.
A follow up to “I Would Run”
Part 2 of my presidential platform.
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“Running on – running on empty
Running on – running blind
Running on – running into the sun
But I’m running behind”
– Jackson Browne
A nonworthwhile try.
The latest mindless mantra projected on the faceless bogeyman is “crime and drugs” to which is an oroborus beast feeding on itself. Therefore the best way to elliminate most of both, would be to make all drugs “legal” or decriminalized.
Nothing would break up the “cartels” quicker than a nod, for them to compete, fair and square, with all the other “legitimate” pharmaceuticals.
The ones harvesting mostly unnatural chemical compounds to numb out an already TV anesthetized soft brained society.
Let them be as liable as the other corporations. If their product doesn’t live up to its expectations, or causes harm, if not used as directed.
They can hire those TV lawyers, perpetually advertising, always trying to cash in on the Erin Brockovich type money.
Have you been injured, are you a victim of your own incompetence or a big business’s standard operating procedure (neglect)?
Call the law offices of “Dewey, Screwum and Howe”. 1 800 Screw U 2
(Best not to run, too easily sidetracked)
(At least my distractions are unplanned.)
Besides, the excessive profits would probably pay for everyone’s universal health care.
Whadaya know, stumbled on a policy just by writing this out. Whodathunk?
Legal or illegal, people are going to do drugs, they already do, alcohol, caffeine and nicotine. In unlimited quantity, regardless of age.
“This is a country where tobacco kills 400,000 people a year — so they ban artifical sweeteners!……Because a rat died. Know what I mean?”
– George Carlin
Categorizing “Other than pharmaceuticals” as illicit substances, only jacks up their appeal and prices.
“Dealer man not dealing drugs because people do drugs, it’s so they will. A way of fixing them, while they break.
As they run out of wishes and hope, he steps in with materials and dope….”
– John Trudell
“Somebody’s Kid”
“This is a place where alcohol ruins more lives than cancer, and everybody gets upset when some athlete gets hooked on cocaine.
You know Time Magazine and Newsweek put cocaine on the cover, but they put the liquor advertisements……. inside the magazine.”
– George Carlin
“Alcohol doesn’t get credit where credit is due, and it’s not the best drug. It’s not even in the top 5. But, it’s the easiest one to get and we’re a fat lazy country of convenience. Alcohol is a very convenient drug.
//
If drinking required that I had to sit in a Denny’s parking lot for two hours in the middle of the night, waiting for my friend Alan to answer his voice mail. Finally show up just to drop off a six pack. I’d never drink again. I’m a lazy #uck.”
– Doug Stanhope
I concur, I enjoy a legal liquid mind altering refreshment, but if it was a hassle to get, would not bother.
“All illegal narcotics are medicinal.
Boredom is a disease worse than cancer. Drugs cure it, with little or no side effects if used as directed. Life’s temporary for a reason, it gets boring after awhile. You should be inventing new drugs is what you should be doing! Newer, crazier drugs… “
– Doug Stanhope
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Make it all “legal” and tax it, like all our other vices and use that money for treatment. Till humans can understand their own divinity.
“Why is the drug czar in this country—well, let’s go back; Why do we have a “drug czar” in this country, A.
B, why is he a cop? Why do they put drug users in jail? They’re sick, they’re not criminals.
Sick people don’t get better in prison.”
– Bill Hicks
“We can have all the blue-ribbon committees we want, but if we don’t get tough on drug dealers we’re wasting our time,” he said in New Hampshire, a state whose overdose rate is twice the national average. “And that toughness includes the death penalty.”
– Donald Trump
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“Now there are alot of people who want to expand the death penalty to include drug dealers. This is really stupid. Drug dealers aren’t afraid to die. They’re already killing each other every day on the streets by the hundreds.
Drive-bys, gang shootings, they’re not afraid to die. Death penalty doesn’t mean anything unless you use it on people who are afraid to die. Like… the bankers who launder the drug money.
The bankers, who launder, the drug money. Forget the dealers, you want to slow down that drug traffic, you got to start executing a few of these fucking bankers. White, middle class Republican bankers.”
– George Carlin
While that might work, it is still a violent solution to a nonviolent problem. Besides, it is on a treadmill run that never ends.
That is the whole point of a treadmill, which when the collective decides to “hop” off, we can all move on to our most ideal potential.
There is no us vs. them. It is all us. Besides, even though there is no proof, am quite sure *eternal recurrence occurs.
* The idea of eternal recurrence—which Nietzsche presents as a sort of thought experiment—appears in Aphorism 341, “The Greatest Weight”:
“What, if some day or night a demon were to steal after you into your loneliest loneliness and say to you: ‘This life as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times more; and there will be nothing new in it, but every pain and every joy and every thought and sigh and everything unutterably small or great in your life will have to return to you, all in the same succession and sequence—even this spider and this moonlight between the trees, and even this moment and I myself.
The eternal hourglass of existence is turned upside down again and again, and you with it, speck of dust!'”
– Fredrich Nietzsche
That certainly highlights our insignificance, however within that, lies our freewill to alter, our thinking and behavior. We can shift our position and perception within that “eternal hourglass”. To get along with all of the other “specks of dust”. That at some point, will meet and be going through the narrow neck at the same time. Might as well make it pleasant as possible.
A follow up to “Running On Empty”
Part 3 of my presidential platform.
“I Would Run”
“Against the wind
We were runnin’ against the wind
We were young and strong,
We were runnin’ against the wind”
– Bob Segar
“If voting made any difference….. they wouldn’t let us do it.”
― Mark Twain
“I’m glad mushrooms are against the law, because I took them one time, and you know what happened to me?
I laid in a field of green grass for four hours going, “My God! I love everything.”
Yeah, now if that isn’t a hazard to our country … how are we gonna keep building nuclear weapons, you know what I mean?
What’s gonna happen to the arms industry when we realize that, WE’RE ALL ONE?!”
– Bill Hicks
Speaking of the arm industry. My perception is that humanity has evolved past the need for war.
Or as Dennis Miller used to say.
“It’s just my opinion, I could be wrong.”
Or to take a line from Doug Stanhope.
“If it didn’t exist, would you invent it?”
War, that is.
Of course not. The whole planet is conquered, in more ways than one.
So…now that we know that and realize the bank draining, soul sucking, life destroying activities of the military industrial complex, it is time to transform the swords into plow shares and other useful things.
“The Davis-Monthan Air Force Base outside Tuscon, Ariz., is where old planes go to die. More than 4,000 military aircraft are parked on the base, from B-52s to stealth bombers, where they are salvaged for parts and broken down for scrap. It’s one of the most popular satellite pictures online, making guided tours of the area a hot ticket.
See the airplane graveyard on Google Maps.”
“Time” Magazine
At a minimum of ten million a piece, that is forty billion tax dollars sitting in the sand. A wasted cog in the wheel of the military industrial complex. Built by fear and patriotism, resource theft and imperialism.
That is the unspoken socialism, nobody (especially those faux broadcast consumers) want to really address.
Where taxpayer money is spent arbitrarily keeping people working for the sake of producing widgets (wmd’s) just to keep them busy.
When instead, quite sure we could use alot of it for housing, or buildings and pipelines for water treatment. Food storage and distribution.
Now that I’ve laid out my dopey hopefully funny useless platform, have decided not to run. Knowing that a meritocracy needs no singular leadership.
“Democracy is the worst kind, I am sorry, but it is. We get to pick our leaders..well…
What if I don’t want a leader? Where does that vote go? I do good on my own, I don’t want to be “led”. Is that freedom?”
– Doug Stanhope
Just a society of people doing what they’d rather be doing. I enjoy being a freight transportation supervisor aka (truck driver) who has the time to think of this and put it to digitized print.
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“I Don’t Want To Be President”
“Just after I was born,
my father said to everyone
That I would be the President one day
You’re a natural politician,
boy, get it in your head
And you know that it might
just turn out that way
So through all the years of my childhood
There more important things than to play
I started caring for my country
and my fellow man
And this is what I would always say
I’d say, I don’t want to be President
But I want to help
the poor and the helpless people
I really don’t want to be President
But if I’m elected I promise to be faithful
I graduated college
with my law degree
I was a young man on the move,
they always say
I was helping my community,
committed to the people
I was working as a citizen,
to build a better day
They persuaded me to run for Congressman
They said from Congress
you could do much more good
And you’ve got to have the power
if your changing things
And I was hoping to do everything
I could for the people
I’d say I don’t want to be President
But I want to help the poor and
the helpless people
I really don’t want to be President
But if I’m elected I promise to be faithful
Time is a march
where the powerful are drummers
Big business, big labor, big oil
And soon I was meeting
with the men who ran the country
The men who owned
the sky and the soil
Oh, I became a Senator,
a man to be reckoned with
Playing golf with millionaires,
and speaking on TV
And when they talked of potential presidential candidates
Most often talked about, and most prominent was me
Well, I got the nomination, ran a campaign of conscience
I stood for peace and brotherhood
and for prosperity
And on the day of the election
I went home to my mansion
When the people had spoken,
they’d elected me
But I don’t want to be President”
– Harry Chapin
Were on the table
For all the world to see
Nancy had an Ace high straight
Donald had two wild cards
(Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh)
Plus has a queen of diamonds
A three of clubs, and six of spades
No heart anywhere
Still couldn’t convince the dealer
He had a winning hand
Ooopsie
Maybe that is why he
Lost money in casinos
He doesn’t understand
Probability and outcome
.
When the next hand is dealt
Before the cards are revealed
Nancy can offer to build a wall
To isolate America from
Society’s worst criminals
Upon agreement
Construction can begin
Placing four walls around
The White House
Trump Tower and
Mar a lago
“Mexico is paying for the wall.”
“Indirectly”
– 45
Through the uscanmex
Or however the
Conartist renamed the
Trade agreement
Formerly known as NAFTA
With a little #45 polish on it
Which means that the
American taxpayer / consumer
Would still be paying for the wall
Duh
How stooopid
Does he think
The public is…….
.
Never mind
With a little collusion
Some social
Media manipulation
Bogus bots
Telling and swaying
Voters, consumers & taxpayers
What to think
Through spacious
Fear based FB posts
Faux regurgitation
Of hyperbolized bogeymen
(Rapists and murderers)
(Drugs, gangs and criminals)
Gee
None which were here
Before
“They” got here
WTF?
Even though statistically it
Doesn’t bear out
.
Having campaign managers
And TV lawyers work for
Him for free
(Paul and Rudy)
(Technically not conflicted because
Technically, 45’s not paying them)
Imagine that
45’s not paying
Compensated by their
Side hustles
Distraction and deceit
As long as the
Bupkus baby billionaire
Gets to feed his
Fevered ego
.
Is this really any different
Than the slight of hand
Ruse of previous administrations
To keep the people
Fighting amongst themselves
With deadly and
Dizzying distractions
Designed to deceive
(The culprits are in Afghanistan
Let’s look in Iraq) GWB
Or
It is unconstitutional to
Assassinate foreign leaders
(Unless you need a distraction
From an erratic economy) BHO
Dull and dumb down
Loving and compassionate
Bipedal earthling artists
That
Given their own
Collective devices
Would look out
For each other
‘Stead of accepting and
Being told a
Bogeyman
Is under the bed
I mean
Beyond an invisible line
Documented as a dots and dashes
Drawn on a map
So
Governments and goons
Can keep laughing
All the way
To the bank
“I feel good tonight, I really do.
I finally got something I always wanted and that’s important. It really is.
I finally got some, uh…. hostages.
Well, you see so many people with hostages nowadays and you say,
“Hey, I’d like some, too!”
So I’ve got three of ’em, they’re really nice people.
We’re getting along great, they’re tied in a sack, outside, at the top of the flagpole.
And I’m gonna blow ’em up at midnight, too.
Unless, of course,
I get my…… three demands.
A hundred thousand in cash,
A getaway car and
I want the letter M stricken from the English language.
See, you have to make one crazy demand, that way, if you get caught, you can plead insanity.
Ha ha….. Getaway car.
What other gags are there?”
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– Steve Martin
“Comedy Is Not Pretty”
“Hostages”
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“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
– Dr Wayne Dyer
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When the official policy
Of the United States is
Not to negotiate
With terrorists
Is it any wonder
Nancy and Chuck
Refuse to give in to
The demands of 45
Albeit a little strange
That the
Despotic dictator
Hostage holder
Is bunkered down
In an oval office?
Rather
“Thee” “Oval Office”
Holding 800,000
Americans hostages
Restricting their freedom
And ability to provide
For their families
Having some work
WITH OUT PAY
I believe that was
Once known as slavery.
Single handedly doing this
Unless, of course,
He gets his….. three demands.
The optics of not appearing foolish
A return to his former life
And an ineffective, scaleable, cutable, that one could pass illicit packages through, wall, barrier or peaches.
See, 45 had to make one crazy demand, that way, when he gets caught, he can plead insanity.
Ha ha….. Not appearing foolish and a return to his former life.
What other gags are there?”
Might be kinda difficult to pull those off, whilst handcuffed wearing an orange jumpsuit, behind a concrete wall.
Wouldn’t it be great / ironic
If those 800,000 immediately
Found good gainful employment
Never to return
And when the partial shutdown ends
Nobody will take those jobs
To be put in that situation
Of being held hostage
By their own president
That they’d be “forced” to hire
Undocumented workers
.
Not sure if that is black irony
But it is definitely brown irony
“There was a respected powerful man
Being mean with a reckless hand”
– John Trudell
“Somebody’s Kid”
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45’s racism is as transparent
As the slat wall he wants
To keep the epidermisly
Darker than him
Bipedal earthling artists
On the other side
I am so sick
Of this wall discussion
It is beneath us
Oh wait
That is the tunnel
Underneath it
Hopefully
I’ll get over it
Just have to
Work through it
Till we all realize
We are all on
The same spaceship
Is that so f’n difficult?
Our only border
Protecting all of us
Is that eggshell
Fragile atmosphere
That sees
What is happening
Patience wearing thin
Must need remember
“It’s just a ride. And we can change it anytime we want. It’s only a choice. No effort, no work, no job, no savings and money. A choice, right now, between fear and love.
The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love, instead, see all of us as one.
Here’s what we can do to change the world, right now, to a better ride. Take all that money that we spend on weapons and defenses each year and instead spend it feeding and clothing and educating the poor of the world, which it would many times over, not one human being excluded, and we could explore space, together, both inner and outer, forever, in peace.”
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– Bill Hicks
