As I try to comprehend
Each and every given moment
In any or all experiences as
A strand in the thread bare fabric
Of the Space-time continuum
Reveals itself for me to pull it
That I, too, may become one
With all of infinite infinity
As in a hand of man to hand of God
I’m never quite able to connect
But then another moment
Comes along near instantaneously
Grabbing my fickle fragile focus
To allow the seamstress of
Insanity to sew up the loose end
I’m looking meticulously for the next one
In a Sisyphean boulder, push up the hill
It will be as long-lasting as the last one
Still, the search continues with all of the hope that
Charlie Brown has for Lucy not to move the ball
Knowing infinitely, he will land on his back….again
It’s best that I chalk it up to experience and move on
How many people’s emotions
Are chemically dependent on
A pharmaceutical behemoth
Industrial corporation complex
That does not give two shits
About anyone’s overall well-being
That are simply contemplating
How to add to their bottom line
In ways to administer drugs with
Just enough poison to sedate
But not enough to quite kill
After all, a dead customer is
A non repeating customer
“I don’t like the drugs, but the drugs like me
I don’t like the drugs, the drugs, the drugs
Norm life, baby
//
You and I are underdosed, and we’re ready to fall
We’re raised to be stupid, taught to be nothing at all
We’re taught to be nothing at all
//
I don’t like the drugs but the drugs like me
I don’t like the drugs, the drugs, the drugs
I don’t like the drugs but the drugs like me
I don’t like the drugs, the drugs, the drugs
Norm life, baby
//
“There’s a hole in our soul that we fill with dope
And we’re feeling fine. “
“There’s a hole in our soul that we fill with dope
And we’re feeling fine. “
“There’s a hole in our soul that we fill with dope
And we’re feeling fine. “
I don’t like the drugs, but the drugs like me
I don’t like the drugs, the drugs, the drugs”
– Marilyn Manson
Cue the TV advertisement……
Never radio. Why??
Because you can not see
The visual cues to trigger
Well crafted head nods and subtle smiles
That subliminally suggest that you, too, can
Be happy as a clam if you can take
A “Doctor” voice recommended dose
To level your lull with lullaby music
As the artificial sun is always shining
Over a fake grass, an extremely clean park
Butterflies flying for no apparent reason
With everyone smiling, staring into the distance
While the voice-over actor repeats
The pharmaceutical poison pill’s name
As it remains permanently on screen
That has more lethal side effects than
Possible cures that you think you “need”
Just call your doctor *…….now
*
“He’s the one they call,”Dr. Feelgood”
He’s the one that makes ya feel all right
He’s the one they call “Dr. Feelgood”
He’s gonna be your Frankenstein
Let him soothe your soul. Just take his hand
(Dr. Feelgood)
Some people call him an evil man
(Dr. Feelgood)
Let him introduce himself real good
(Dr. Feelgood)
He’s the only one they call “Feelgood””
– Motley Crüe
“And by the way, you’re supposed to have anxiety. Did you know that? It’s a human emotion. It’s been around for a couple of million years.
You’re supposed to worry about things. You’re supposed to be concerned that the rent’s not going to get paid,
…………‘cause that’s how the fucking rent gets paid!”
– Christopher Titus
“I Wanna Be Sedated
Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothin’ to do and nowhere to go
I wanna be sedated
Just get me to the airport
Put me on a plane
Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane
I can’t control my fingers
I can’t control my brain
Oh no no no no no
Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go
I wanna be sedated
Nothin’ to do and nowhere to go
I wanna be sedated
Just put me in a wheelchair
Get me on a plane
Hurry hurry hurry before I go insane
I can’t control my fingers
I can’t control my brain
Oh no no no no no
I wanna be sedated
I wanna be sedated
I wanna be sedated
I wanna be sedated”
– Ramones
“I write to expunge the darkness
So that someday
Light may shine through”
– Angelo Devlin
Of time travelers who
Can not find
Their time machine
To get back to where
They started from or
When they need to
Escape from fast
Yet, there is no “to”
To be in, that is safe
From making those
Sophie’s choice decisions
That do not alter each
Or subsequent timelines
From previous outcomes
I may be a free spirit or
I may be a ridged contrarian
Or perhaps a rebel
Without a cause
But, the one thing
I follow
Is time’s arrow >>>———->
It does not go north or south
East or west, up or down
Only forward, never reverse
What I have done or thought
Even one billionth of a second ago
Can not be undone, holy shit!
Even for this blog post
I could press delete instead of schedule
Which only means you wouldn’t read this
Everything else follows a trajectory
(Even you can not unread these words
You may forget or ignore them, however
Now the ball is in your court, to like or leave)
Type it out, edit, add lyrics and quotes
That pop in my head from a vast collection
Of about the only information I remember…
Useless knowledge
“Let’s just think about this for a minute”
– Bill Hicks
“Eggs do not get unbroken, milk won’t unspill
and baseballs will not return to the bat.”
– Dr. Brian Greene
Thoughts, actions, and unkindness, etc.
All proceed in an irreversible manner
Likewise, so does kindness, etc.
“We teach best what we need to learn most ourselves.”
– Richard Bach
“Time Marches On”
“Sister cries out, from her baby bed
Brother runs in, feathers on his head
Mama’s in her room learnin’ how to sew
Daddy’s drinkin’ beer, listenin’ to the radio
Hank Williams sings Kaw-Liga and Dear John
And time marches on, time marches on
Sister’s using rouge and clear complexion soap
Brother’s wearin’ beads and he smokes a lot of dope
Mama is depressed, barely makes a sound
Daddy’s got a girlfriend in another town
Bob Dylan sings “Like a Rolling Stone”
And time marches on, time marches on
The South moves north, North moves south
A star is born, a star burns out
The only thing that stays the same is
Everything changes, everything changes
Sister calls herself a sexy grandma
Brother’s on a diet for high cholesterol
Mama’s out of touch with reality
Daddy’s in the ground beneath the maple tree
As the angels sing an old Hank Williams song
Time marches on, time marches on
Time marches on, time marches on
Time marches on, time marches on”
– Tracy Lawrence
“Caught Somewhere In Time”
“If you had the time to lose
An open mind and time to choose
Would you care to take a look
Or can you read me like a book?
Time is always on my side
Time is always on my side
Can I tempt you, come with me
Be Devil may care, fulfill your dream
If I said I’d take you there
Would you go, would you be scared?
Time is always on my side
Time is always on my side
Don’t be afraid, you’re safe with me
Safe as any soul can be honestly
Just let yourself go
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time… oh oh
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time… oh oh
Like a wolf in sheep’s clothing
You try to hide your deepest sins
Of all the things that you’ve done wrong
And I know where you belong
Time is always on my side
Time is always on my side
Make you an offer you can’t refuse
You’ve only got your soul to lose
Eternally… let yourself go!
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time… oh oh
Caught somewhere in time
Caught somewhere in time
Caught now in two minds!”
– Iron Maiden
On another level
You chose to be born
You cannot choose be unborn
Even suicide does not undo that
However, you can choose
Not to create a vehicle
For another soul to drive
Whilst you get your
Shit together first
It makes the layers of
Complications clearer and
Much easier to deal with
Me, I am recognizing that all ways, always
“I’ve got a long way to go
And a short time to get there
I’m forward bound,
Just watch ol’ Angelo run”
With apologies to….
– Jerry Reed’s
“East Bound and Down”
My house of cards
On a Sisyphean rock
Wish me luck
I am sure it will end
Up like a castle
As soon as I
Get to the top
Occur in the Planktonian nanosecond
Before you awake from a short slumber
Or a deep REM sleep of unconsciousness
With the whole universe laid out
Before you, to exercise one’s limited freewill
Each and every time that you wake up
Like, in the Bill Murray movie “Groundhog Day,”
As the universe sings, “I’ve Got You Babe,”
Where each day is a lifetime and likewise
Every lifetime is a day in which you get to play
You are the creation of yourself
In your own image with all of the
Beliefs you choose to believe for the
Sake of experiencing experiences
A sort of erasure occurs during
This reset of slumber and things
Can look completely different or
Entirely the same depending on
One’s perspective outlook and plan
I am learning this, and therefore
Trying to shrug the atlas to enjoy
Each moment’s experience
What could be better than that?
Try holding on to the last moment
While reaching for the next
“Hold on to nothing, as fast as you can.”
Tori Amos
From “Pretty good year”
Realizing that there is zero evidence of
Creation or the big bang, save for theories
Printed in books with demarcation agendas
In the alleged beginning, blah, blah, blah…..blah
(Science is just as guilty as religion)
Too many scientists anchor their dialog
Around an accepted “theory” as proof *
When you hear or read anyone, especially scientists
Ask yourself if they know when or where
The big bang occurred in apparent surroundings
Of which they do not, then you will know
It completely obliterates their notion that
Science is all about facts and proof, while
Dismissing proof that all exists, always, all ways
Which doesn’t require belief, only fascination
To wonder with wow, that I can think, utilizing
The conglomeration of molecules that have
Manifested into an autonomous being with a brain
That can see, smell, taste, touch, hear, etc.
Having concrete opinions based on malleable
Medias, pointing which way the wind blows
* The Big Bang
A theory that has as much proof as
Folklore, wishful thinking and time, like
Unicorns, karma, solipsism, bogeymen,
Freedom, justice, liberty, reincarnation,
Democracy, being the “best” form of gov’t,
The “age” of our planet, the edge of the universe
Who shot JFK, Noah’s ark, talking serpents,
The well-being of Schrödinger’s cat, etc.
“Pretty Good Year”
Tears on the sleeve of a man
Don’t wanna be a boy today
Heard the eternal footman
Bought himself a bike to race
And Greg he writes letters
And burns his CDs
They say you were something in those formative years
Hold onto nothing
As fast as you can
Well still pretty good year
Maybe a bright sandy beach
Is going to bring you back
May not so now you’re off
You’re gonna see America
Well let me tell you something about america
Pretty good year
Some things are melting now
Well what’s it gonna take
Till my baby’s alright
And Greg he writes letters with his birthday pen
Sometimes he’s aware that they’re drawing him in
Lucy was pretty
Your best friend agreed
Still Pretty good year
– Tori Amos
To ourselves creating
Our collective reality
Or our (soul’s) self
Creating a subjective one
Even if not, could you
Think of a better way
To take responsibility
For every action that
One utilizes their behavior
Or context of words to
Manipulate an outcome
To one’s own liking
Not for karma or justice or
Approval from God / Word
But simply for the
Sake of experiences
Exhaustively repetitious or
Seemingly brand new
“The heaviest burden:
“What, if some day or night, a demon were to steal after you into your loneliest loneliness and say to you:
‘This life, as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times more; and there will be nothing new in it, but every pain and every joy and every thought and sigh… must return to you—all in the same succession and sequence—even this spider and this moonlight between the trees and even this moment and I myself.
The eternal hourglass of existence is turned over again and again—and you with it, speck of dust!’
Would you not throw yourself down and gnash your teeth and curse the demon who spoke thus? Or have you once experienced a tremendous moment when you would have answered him:
‘You are a god, and never have I heard anything more divine!’ If this thought were to gain possession of you, it would change you as you are, or perhaps crush you.
The question in each and every thing, “do you want this once more and innumerable times more?” would lie upon your actions as the greatest weight.
Or how well disposed would you have to become to yourself and to life to crave nothing more fervently than this ultimate eternal confirmation and seal?”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
Don’t let it crush you
Otherwise, it will
Infinitely crush you
Consider then, having experienced
Infinite births, infinite deaths
Infinite loves at “first” sight
Infinite failed tests, infinite success
Infinite toe stubs, infinite headaches
Infinite marriages, infinite divorces
Infinite children, infinite good jobs
Infinite bad bosses, infinite, etcetera’s
Infinite bowel movements
“Ooops, I think I’ve gone too far,”
– George Carlin
How, after all of that
Does one not consider the
Miracle of each moment
Passed through infinitely
“Infinite Dreams”
“Infinite dreams, I can’t deny them
Infinity is hard to comprehend
I couldn’t hear those screams
Even in my wildest dreams
Suffocation waking in a sweat
Scared to fall asleep again
In case the dream begins again
Someone chasing, I can not move
Standing rigid, a nightmare’s statue
What a dream when will it end
And will I transcend?
Restless sleep the minds in turmoil
One nightmare ends another fertile
It’s getting to me so scared to sleep
But scared to wake now, in too deep.
Even though it’s reached new heights
I’d rather like the restless nights
It makes me wonder, it makes me think
There’s more to this. I’m on the brink
It’s not the fear of what’s beyond
It’s just that I might not respond
I have an interest almost craving
But would I like to get too far in?
Can’t all be coincidence
Too many things are evident
You tell me you’re an unbeliever
Spiritualists? Well, me, I’m neither
Wouldn’t you like to know
The truth?
Or what’s out there to have the proof
And find out just which side
You’re on
Where would you end in Heaven or
In Hell?
Help me. Help me to find my true
Self without seeing the future
Save me, save me from torturing
Myself, even within my dreams
There’s got to be just more to it than this
Or tell me why do we exist
I’d like to think that when I die
I’d get a chance another time
And to return and live again
Reincarnate, play the game
Again and again and again.”
– Iron Maiden
Of childhood wonder
Need not be lost in the
Protracted indoctrination
Of repetitive information
That answers
Unanswerable questions
With regurgitated, mostly
Hand me down bullshit
To satiate the ego of the
Alleged authority figures
Bestowing their “knowledge”
Upon their unsuspecting
Malleable open offspring
Via their Cronkite confidence
“And, that’s the way it is.”
End all be all question closer
Which then gets handed out
To various other “Authorities”
Because “because “they” said so”
Or such and such….is in a book
Since that response is easier
Then, re-asking the questions
That the inquisitive mind
Wants to know again and again
Over and over, till it, sorta knows
Whereas the preface could be
“To my best understanding, it is
Like this, but let us investigate”
Opening up a can of
Continuous questions
Drawing on endless conclusions
Then, mysterious wonder will
Never cease to question reality
Thankfully, after crossing the
Threshold of gaslighting parents
I found the wisdom of George Carlin
“Children should be taught to question everything. To question everything they read, everything they hear. Children should be taught to question authority.
Parents never teach their children to question authority because parents are authority figures themselves, and they don’t want to undermine their own bullshit inside the household.”
– George Carlin
Subsequently,
“I just think it is interesting to see how people act on their beliefs, you know what I mean. Because your beliefs are just that, they are just how you were taught and raised. That doesn’t make them real.”
– Bill Hicks
Also,
“I don’t even understand the connection with ‘died for your sins’. He died for your sin. Well, how does one affect the other? ‘I hit myself in the foot with a shovel for your mortgage’…”
– Doug Stanhope
If I am made up of molecules
Of those that are zipping around
Intertwined with molecules
That are of my adversary
Then I am them and
They are me, then what
Is all the fighting all about
Or, while looking at the
World through a windshield
You ponder that the “solid”
But see through glass is
Your window to the world
That the signpost up ahead
Gives you a speed limit and
Not the declaration that you
Have entered the Twilight Zone
Is likewise made of molecules
Coagulating as the illusion
Of a solid stationary sign
When nothing could be
Further from the truth, that it too
Is made up of moving molecules
In the agreed to mind construct
Of the unifying universal mind
So that one can play the game
To experience experiences for
The sake of the mystery
“All of that
Which has reality
Has no basis
In reality.”
– Angelo Devlin
Is about to begin
On the level of a
Paradigm shift
No one has ever
Experienced before
Where the actors
Become the audience
The puppeteers are
Now the players
Where the one who is
Allegedly amassing
A trillion dollars goes
Against the one percent
The billionaire puppeteers
As the Ninety-nine percent
Who have been fighting
Amongst themselves can now
All get along in a role reversal
Grab a soda and popcorn
See the billionaires scramble
To accept the logic of the
Trickle-down theory
Waiting for their crumbs
Of the leftovers from the one
Up and coming Trillionaire
The newly anointed audience
Will come together
Shake hands, share stories
Celebrate similarities, apologize
That they let desperate distractions
Get the best of them, forgetting that
Everyone is connected
To Gaia consciousness
Then, what will make the show short is that
The 99% will reach out to the 1% and the 1
Reach out with compassion
Not control with condemnation
To say look, we are all the same
Riding on the same sphere
Hurling through the cosmos
Let’s fix our spaceship because
We need to make it last for every one
Otherwise, the gig is up for all
“The Show Must Go On”
Empty spaces
What are we living for?
Abandoned places
I guess we know the score
On and on
Does anybody know what we are looking for?
Another hero
Another mindless crime
Behind the curtain
In the pantomime
Hold the line
Does anybody want to take it anymore?
Show must go on
Show must go on
Inside, my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking
But my smile still stays on
Whatever happens
I’ll leave it all to chance
Another heartache
Another failed romance
On and on
Does anybody know what we are living for?
I guess I’m learning
I must be warmer now
I’ll soon be turning
‘Round the corner now
Outside, the dawn is breaking
But inside in the dark, I’m aching to be free
Show must go on
Show must go on
Inside, my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking
But my smile still stays on
My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies
Fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die
I can fly, my friends
Show must go on
Show must go on
I’ll face it with a grin
I’m never giving in
On with the show
I’ll top the bill
I’ll overkill
I have to find the will to carry on with the show
On with the show
Show must go on
“Queen”
Of detachment
Is required to be human
In an inhumane world
An excessive quantity is
Necessary to connect
With all of humanity
On a molecular
Likewise, spiritual level
That no being
Or anything else is
Outside of one’s self
While not provably proveable
It is logically proveable
Everyone is riding on the same sphere
Breathing from the same available oxygen
Experiencing the same sun and moon
Regardless of how all came into being
From cosmic consciousness or
Imaginings from infinite infinity or
Beliefs in a benign and beneficial being or
Designed by a devilish deity
Pick your suspicion, nothing is proveable
Take away the books, lessons, indoctrinations
Close your eyes, slow your breathing, think
How have I come to be here, in this form
With abilities to see, hear, taste, smell, touch
Experience experiences for experiences sake
Read the ramblings of a random ranting blog
That starts off about certain detachments
Then closes involving complete connections
I wish I knew too, I do not
I just come up with a title for a concept,
A vague direction and like that old
Telephone book advertisement catchphrase
I let my fingers do the walking
When they get tired and rest
I look up to see where they’ve been
Find myself intrigued and amused
Then, with a certain amount of detachment
Make a few edits, then schedule to post
“I do not know
Where I am going
But I do know
I am moving forward. “
– Angelo Devlin
Of the universal mind
Is becoming a favorite
Phase of mine, whereas
An invisible gathering
Of sophisticated souls
Got together to make
A game that anyone
Could play as long as
They agreed to the rules
Set forth on the playing field of
Time, space, gravity, and light to
See, hear, taste, touch, smell
Balance, have thermoception
(Sense degrees of hot or cold)
Know nocioception (pain) and
Sense interoception (internal pain)
Absorb nutrients, expel waste
Have hunger, emit emotion
Respond to acceleration and
Centrifugal forces, yet not velocity*
Experience faith, hope, love, and laughter
Doubt, anger, hate, failure, and success
Learn a language, add numbers, hold a belief
Make, mistake, or manipulate a memory
Did I leave anything out? Probably.
Oh yeah. Hear one’s own voice, without ears.
Wow. We ought to thank Word
For constructing this game
From particles and waves
Having been “here” infinitely forever
That we might play such a precious game
I watched snow falling
And that somehow
The collective mind
Made up the rules that
There are no two snowflakes
Exactly alike, though
They look the same
In a cup of coffee
Still, they fell, and the
World looked peaceful
As I pondered what
It would have taken
To make the game
We are playing so that
Within that, we could
Experience an infinite
Number of realities
Based on perception
Narratives and notions
Limited but fun free will
Choose to act or
Wait in the green room
Forget lines or ad lib
Formate friends or foes
Hold, change, or discard opinions
Based on rumor, hearsay, and innuendo
Indoctrinated by parents or caretakers
Managed and manipulated by medias
So that by the childhood age of reason
One can doubt and question authority
Walk the razor’s edge tightrope of
Rebellion and resistance
Against acceptance and adherence
Also, known as the Red and Blue Pill
From “The Matrix” within this matrix
From a mystical Milton Bradley or
Holistic Hasbro or Particle Parker Brothers
Maybe a Narcissistic Nintendo
Solipsistic Sony, or Ethereal Electronic Arts
Matters not the manufacturer
You get to pick, change, or discard
Knowing how they all
Come from the same source
Word(s)
*
When you walk to the bathroom on an airplane
You do not realize you are moving at 600 miles per hour
But will utilize the basic and special senses
To get there and back to your seat. Crazy huh?
“I never wish to be right,
Only to be understood,
If you have questioned
Your beliefs. Then maybe,
I have done some good.”
– Angelo Devlin
Looking at the world through a windshield. 